This morning there was alarm and rampant concern throughout the Village of Andover over a crop of very malnourished scarecrows that popped up in the park at the corner of South Main St. And East Greenwood St. These "scarecrows" appeared sometime overnight mysteriously.
One resident stated "That scarecrow is nothing but sticks and air. No straw? The lack of overalls and a hat is, frankly, indecent. What will the children think?"
An Andover Chamber of Commerce member said "the scarecrows were in the planters last year, but the chamber moved them to the park as they were a distraction to drivers."
When pressed further about the unhealthy body standards these scarecrows were setting for our vulnerable village youth she stated "These are just the support structures. People haven't had time to add their scarecrows yet."
There are still some scarecrows available for decorating if you'd like to participate.
Further commentary questioned if the "scarecrow" might have some religious significance. However, when asked about religion the scarecrows in question declined to comment.
The chamber assures the public that these scarecrows will be stuffed and dressed in no time by local businesses and volunteers. If you're interested in helping the Andover Chamber of Commerce with their volunteering and fundraising please reach out to their Facebook page.
Andover Exclusive 2024
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